This list is by no means complete or completely throrough or even organized in a way that a perfectionist, such as myself, is comfortable with. I plan to add to and edit as we go along. I did want to get this out for folks in hopes that it will be beneficial to you as you walk the difficult journey of being the parent of a teenager.
I'm always open to good resources. Please share with me/others if there is something out there that would help us. Know that you don't walk this journey alone.
Books
The 10 Best Ways to Ruin Your Teenager by Israel Galindo (my education professor in seminary and is top-notch).
the first mistake most parents make is to attempt to "parent" their teenager. The more helpful stance, the authors say, is a coaching and challenging relationship that helps guide the teenager toward maturity and personal responsibility. The authors identify the ten most common errors that parents make in their relationship with their teenagers, and they suggest ways to change ineffective parental behaviors that will only frustrate the teenager and keep the parents' marriage stuck. While the book focuses on principles of the parental relationship, the book contains practical and helpful examples on how to first, handle yourself, and then, handle your teenager.
Search Institute (more resources here than you could ever use in your entire lifetime, but good stuff)
- a leader and partner for organizations around the world in discovering what kids need to succeed. Our knowledge and resources help motivate and equip caring adults to create schools, communities, and families where young people thrive.
- 40 developmental assets - common sense, positive experiences and qualities that help influence choices young people make and help them become caring, responsible, successful adults.
Click here for the list for ages 8-12
What Teens Needs to Succeed: inspires and empowers teens to build their own assets. It invites readers to identify the assets they already have and the ones they need,
Reflections on raising children in a world where entitlement and competition abound have struck a chord with thousands of readers. In a culture whose values are often at odds with the ones parents wish to uphold and instill, The Blessing of a Skinned Knee points the way to raising self–reliant, compassionate and ethical children.
address key parenting issues such as:
- Teaching respect for adults
- Chores
- Keeping expectations in line with your child’s temperament
- Meal-time battles
- Coping with frustration
- Avoiding over-scheduling and overindulgence
- Helping your child develop independence and self-control
How to be #SocialMediaParents: A new book by Brian Foreman, friend and guru on youth ministry.
- A practical guide for parents to better understand social media and how their children are using it.
- The first is to help parents better understand the technology available to their children. The second is to help parents better understand their teenagers. It would be a mistake however to assume this book is just about technology. Ultimately, it focuses on helping the parent use technology to enhance their offline relationships. This is critical for parent-teen relationship, for keeping children safe and for teaching teenagers about acceptable behavior online in public spaces
Online resources
Parent Further - Everyday Parenting Ideas from Search Institute [a resource for families]). Click here to go to a specific e-mail sent to me entitled It isn't easy being a parent.
If you click on the Parent Further link above, you'll have the opportunity to sign up for regular e-mails about everyday parenting ideas.
"From time to time, all parents need a little help. Sometimes, a piece of solid, encouraging advice can help you have an 'a-ha' moment that changes the way you think and act. Instead of focusing on what’s wrong with kids, our positive, strength-based approach to parenting focuses on what’s right with kids (and parents), and the small, everyday steps you can take to help kids be successful in the future."
Love and Logic - "helps parents to have more fun and less stress while raising responsible kids of all ages". provides simple and easy to use techniques to help parents have more fun and less stress while raising responsible kids of all ages."
Zits cartoons - click here to subscribe and get a Zits cartoon by e-mail each day; very funny cartoon about teenagers and parenting
Mom, Dad, Here's What I Wish You Knew, an e-book by Brian Foreman, a former youth minister, a dad of a teenager, and the person who puts together Social Media Parents.
Social Media Parents - Their mission - To assist parents with building better communication with their teenagers, online and face-to-face. Click here for the Facebook group.
Michelle in the Middle - Author, educator, and social leadership strategist, Michelle Icard creates emotional relief for t(w)eens, parents, and educators by providing clear wisdom and pragmatic tools that ease stress and create connection.
Articles
The kids truly are all right - our teenagers are doing a lot better than our culture seems to suggest
7 rules for parents - some basic principles for good parenting
What happens when mom unplugs teens for 6 months - you might be surprised
Family variables that influence teen religious loyalty - information from the book Choosing Church
What parents/youth wished the other understood about them - a list pulled together from 2 separate conversations with Park Road parents and youth
Parent advice from teenagers - from the book 10 best parenting ways to ruin your teenager (see above); you'll have to do a little shuffling and head turning when reading this article :)
Raising responsible kids - practical suggestions for pre-teens and full-blown teenagers
To You -a wonderful litany about how precious our children are
Discipline guidelines for teens - from the book 10 Best Parenting Ways to Ruin Your Teenager (see above). You'll have to do a little head turning when reading it.
Backlash against overparenting - article from Time Magazine
How Happy are your kids - research from 2006 about what teens are stressed about and some coping mechanisms for parents.
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